TV is the new reading

‘The Cleaner’ fits well into A&E’s crime slot

There was a time, long ago, when A&E featured Agatha Christie mysteries and other delightful fluff where an antiques appraiser ran about the countryside peeking into armoires and credenzas and solving mysteries.

Oh, sure, at about 9 p.m. it became the Nazi War Atrocities channel and a celebration of all things World War II. But up until then you could see a biography of Grace Kelly or a crime solved by a teacup.

There’s still a crime focus on A&E. But now, because everything on cable television is on steroids, it’s crime to the extreme! It’s lantern-jowled Bill Kurtis and “American Justice” or “Dog the Bounty Hunter.” It’s “Intervention,” “Jacked” and “The First 48.”

Poor Miss Marple wouldn’t know where to look.

And, naturally, in all of this, there is “The Cleaner.”

Bad vibes

I had a bad feeling about this. It seems to be based on the life and times of William Banks, a real-life “extreme interventionist.” The show says he’s helped nearly 300 people fight some sort of addiction or another, and that he’s not a superhero or a cop, but just a guy with a calling.

I’ve only caught a couple of episodes, so this reaction is not definitive. But when Robert LaSardo pops up in the first episode I see, I know the show is going to be way over the top. LaSardo shows up whenever a casting director needs someone to be eeeeevil, and this was no exception. He appeared as the leader of a meth-dealing biker gang who offered a former associate $30,000 to run meth for him.

But no! The man was clean! But darn it all to heck, he needed the money to rescue his teenage son from the foster care system – isn’t it always the way? – so they could be together forever. Oh, except that ... um ... for some reason, well, the guy actually started smoking meth again, too. Dratted addictions!

And Banks set up his associate Arnie to infiltrate the gang, modifying their gas tanks to carry the meth so no one would suspect. But LaSardo forced him to take a hit of meth to prove he wasn’t a cop — I hate it when that happens! And then there was shooting. And Banks’ son is upset with him and runs off, and Banks looks to the sky and demands answers.

None were forthcoming.

Outreach

The second episode I saw involved Banks and his associates pretending to be homeless to track down an ex-Green Beret and FBI agent who’d become addicted to meth and had given up on life until he realized he’d gotten his partner pregnant and then he got shot and ...

Wow, there’s a lot of gunplay in this show. Life on the mean streets is pretty gritty, huh? Thank goodness Banks can go back to his lovely home and his loving wife and ... well, at least one of his children, since his son got sick of his over-the-top temper and ran off.

He’s much better off there than, say, sitting up with his tweaker associate, Arnie, who now has the shakes ... even though he was also somehow able to track down the sonogram and medical files of an FBI agent. How’d he manage that impossibility? “Digging. Lots and lots of digging.”

I ... see. The dialogue in the show is equally complex. Observe:

Akani (another of Banks’ associates): “Are you using again?”
Arnie: “It was one hit and I had a gun to my head. Figure it out.”

Inconsistencies

There’s actually a lot of inconsistencies in the show. What his associates are actually for, for instance. What it is he actually does. In theory, his calling involves kidnapping people and chucking them into rehab until they clean up — hence the name — with the assurance that he’s been there and he knows what they’re going through, and this is what they need.

Well, I can’t see that making for such compelling television either. No wonder we need all of the drama with his family.

Drug addiction is ugly, violent and messy. It destroys lives. It is not entertainment, nor is it especially artistic. But it does seem to fit in really well with what A&E has been showing lately.

“The Cleaner” airs at 9 p.m. Tuesdays on A&E.